Celebrity Gossip
Monday, 07 December 2015 15:59

20 Other Items Donald Trump Wants Banned From America

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We can pretty much all now agree that Donald Trump is a major brown and orange stain on the American landscape and instead of running for president, he should be locked away in a psychiatric hospital ward where he can brag to the orderlies how YUGE the results from his 3x a day Rogaine regimen is working out for him (or not).

Well Donny Throw-up has recently taken a bit of a hit in the polls, notably in Iowa where he is now polling behind Cap'n Canada Cruz, so Donny has to put his "Asshole Meter" on blast to appeal to his base. He did that by declaring if elected president (*snicker*), he will create some kind of law thingy where Muslims will not be allowed into the United States and all current Muslim citizens will be told what each one of Lindsay Lohan's sugar-daddies tells her after she spends two months living rent-free inside their expensive London homes - "GIT OUT."

That's not a very nice thing for a presidential candidate to do. Also, I've learned there are many other items Donny Doofus wants to completely ban from the country. Here is a list of the 20 people and items Donny Dickface wishes to ban once he's elec-(*mmmphh*):


#20: Yummy chili cheese nachos


#19: Every VHS Copies of The Flintstones starring Rosie O'Donnell

#18: Hollywood Hulk Hogan action figure from 1998


#17: People from riding shopping carts in the park


#16: 80's fringe leather jackets

#15: Gillette Fusion razor blades

#14: The Victoria's Secret mail catalog

#13: This Giant XTC mountain bike

#12: Slip 'N Slides

#11: 8GB Darth Maul USB flash drives

#10: The Snuggie

#9: Awesome Ninja Babes


#8: That Times Square Spider-Man with the fanny pack


#7: PEZ!

#6: Dr. Oz

#5: A cassette tape of I Am the Cute One by Mary-Kate + Ashley Olsen


#4: Yoga pants


#3: Hockey


#2: Kittens


#1: His son-in-law Jared Kushner (because Donny really wants to bang his daughter).

This has been "20 Other Items Donald wants To Ban From America."

Trump 2016 - Making Americans Nauseous Again!

Image Courtesy Washington Post

Published in Celebrity Gossip Tagged under Donald Trump

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