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Wednesday, 24 May 2017 07:44

Vanity Fair's STAR WARS: THE LAST JEDI Covers

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This summer movie season is turning out to be one of the worst I can remember. My birthday is this weekend and my choices for a b-day movie are Pirates 5, Baywatch or Alien whatever. I think I'll just stay in, order pizza and surrender my brain and frazzled nerves to Twin Peaks and remind myself that's it's Only four months until the fall and we get better movies like Blade Runner 2046 and Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi (which opens December 18th). As tradition, Vanity Fair showcases SW:TLJ with a magazine profile featuring interviews with the cast and makers, a look at returning and new characters and tidbits about the plot (hint: it takes place among the stars and apparently there's a war - don't sue me Disney.)

Vanity Fair just unveiled four new covers and the one above featuring a Obi-Wan-ish Luke Skywalker and Rey is my favorite. I don't know what they are looking at while standing on a rocky cliff on planet Auch-Tu, but it's probably not a rescue boat full of aliens - then again, it actually might be judging by some photos of filming. Wow. An alien rescue boat in the middle of the water. This movie is going to be f-ing weird.

The cast of Star Wars VIII welcomed famed photographer Annie Liebovitz on set to capture Mark Hamill and Daisy in Ireland (where Mark admits it took him an hour and a half to climb to the top of the mountain) and to also shoot Adam Driver as Kylo Ren, John Boyega as Finn, Oscar Isaac as Poe Dameron, Gewndoline Christie as Captain Phasma and Carrie Fisher as General Leia. Liebovitz also photographs Anthony Daniels as C-3PO - while holding the droid's head under his hand (dude, weird.)

But possibly the most striking photo is one captured by Annie of Mark and Carrie in a tender bonding hug so I guess we can safely assume that an on-screen reunion between Luke and Leia occurs in Last Jedi, which will be the first time we've seen these characters share a moment since 1983's Return of the Jedi. Maybe these two met up and decided to take in a night of gambling at the alien casino we will see in this movie. Wait! An alien casino. Holy cow, man - like I said, weird.

 

   

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Tuesday, 23 May 2017 00:19

Here's The Killer Song From TWIN PEAKS

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Fans of Twin Peaks were finally rewarded with two brand new episodes last night - which they only had to wait 311 months for (or 25 years and eleven months - however you wish to count the time between seasons). As for those episodes, well I'm still picking up bits of my brain from the floor because my brain WAS BLOWN! Were these new episodes of Twin Peaks as good as I hoped they would be? They were BETTER. At times, while watching these new episodes, it felt like Twin Peaks was more real than reality itself which is probably because Twin Peaks has been living inside me for 22 years. That's more than - well, I'm not giving away my age here but let's just say this show has been a part of me for most of my life. Did any of the questions I had regarding the characters in the original series get answered? I'm still not sure. Well, yeah I guess a few did. Agent Cooper was still stuck in that Black Lodge and now I even have more questions about that: is he still wearing the same suit as he was 25 years ago? (He is.) Where did he cook his meals during these years? Does Domino's deliver to the Black Lodge? Does it get cable and where is the bathroom in that place? 25 years is a long time to hold it in.

 

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Saturday, 20 May 2017 23:54

Here's Amber Heard As Mera In Aquaman

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Earlier this week, director James Wan shared this photo on Twitter of Amber Heard as a Greedo-ish looking character in the upcoming Aquaman movie which also stars Jason Momoa as well, Aquaman, Willem Dafoe, Patrick Wilson and Nicole Kidman(!) as Queen Atlanna. I know absolutely nothing about Aquaman or anything about the character Mera who Amber plays, but Aquaman doesn't open until December 21, 2018 so I have time to brush up on all it. This also gives the Warner Bros. marketing department lots of time to come up with a promotional campaign besides 'Thank God We Don't Have To Compete With A Star Wars Movie This Christmas.' Boy, I Hope they come up with something good because that one I just mentioned will be real tough to improve on.

Image Courtesy Jasin Boland/Warner Bros.

 

Published in Film & Movie Tagged under Amber Heard Aquaman 

 

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Happy mother's day! Darren Aronofsky (Black Swan) unveiled the teaser poster for his upcoming horror/chiller/drama/whatever-the-f-ck film Mother! which opens two weeks before Halloween. Here you can see Jennifer Lawrence holding her own ripped out bleeding heart in her hands yet her expression seems more like she's handing out free samples of pizza rolls at Costco. No really, this is the exact expression Costco sample servers display on their faces. THIS right here. Now whenever I walk by a sample of Costco's red velvet mini-cakes I'm going to think of Jennifer Lawrence holding her gross, slimy heart in her hands. Thanks, Hollywood. 

Published in Film & Movie Tagged under

Friday, 30 December 2016 00:00

Traylor Howard Latest Victim Of Celebrity Death Hoax

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Actress Traylor Howard, the adorable, talented star of Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place (the title I still call the show, even though ABC changed it two seasons in - a move which confused audiences who thought ABC was airing two shows about two sets of dudes and a girl - that wasn't The Drew Carey Show) was the latest victim of an online death hoax

Monday, 15 August 2016 00:00

Amber Heard Finally Arrived For Her Deposition

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Those nuns watching Amber Heard walk down a street in Paris had better use some of their pull with the guy upstairs in regards to helping Amber out because after a week of delays, she finally sat for a grilling at the hands of Johnny Depp's attorneys and they went all in.

Amber Heard was grilled until she was well done Saturday, sitting for her long-awaited deposition for 7 long hours. Amber was asked about her claims of violence at the hands of Johnny Depp, and not just on May 21st. She was asked in great detail

Tuesday, 02 August 2016 18:13

Lea Michele Nude For Women's Health

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Looks like Melania Trump is not the only one who decided that posing nude in publications would be a good career bouncer because here is the very annoying Lea Michele appearing naked on the cover of Women's Health UK.  I'd love to know who the person was that thought readers would actually want to see this because I can pretty much tell you that no, nobody wanted to see this. Even Lea's mother. It's true. Told me herself. Nice woman. Makes wonderful raspberry muffins.

Lea tells Women's Health UK "When I left Glee, I needed something to replace all the dancing about I was doing. Right now, I feel physically in my best shape and emotionally in my best place. I keep my home almost completely gluten free and vegan, which I think is important because when you reach for a snack at home, then you’re getting something healthy. When I say I splurge – that’s pizza, mac and cheese, pasta; it’s not McDonald’s. Look everyone can do whatever they want, this is just what I do. I have down days. I accept those days as much as the happy ones,” but to get over those down days she says "I make some macaroni cheese, call my mom, pour a glass of red wine and watch some reality television. There’s nothing that can’t fix.”

Uh-huh.

Published in Celebrity Gossip Tagged under Lea Michele

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Tuesday, 02 August 2016 16:31

Donald Trump Enjoys Some KFC

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70 year old, 260 pound bag of smelly, rotten cooked carrots, Donald Trump is not having a good week. He is losing to Hillary Clinton by as much as 9 points in a number of polls and his convention "bump" sank faster this week than one of Lindsay Lohan's exposed boobs. So, what does Donny do to try to regain favor with his supporters? He tries to relate to them by tweeting photos of himself fake-eating the type of food he believes they shovel into their gum-holes. Previously it was a Taco Bowl and today it's a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken - although as you can see, he's not even touching it. The fork and knife is a nice touch, although I'm pretty sure the average Trump supporter don't use no fancy yoo-tinsels. That's LEE-TIST! I'm pretty certain they attack chicken with their hands harder than a pack of starving Gremlins ten minutes past midnight. Now, although Trump doesn't eat the KFC, this is not the first time he's ordered it. In fact, I heard from a source inside the Trump team that Donald orders a full KFC family meal practically every day. A-ha! So now we finally know what that straggly mess on Trump's head is comprised of - KFC coleslaw, while the chicken grease is to hold it all together. BUSTED!

Published in Celebrity Gossip Tagged under Donald Trump
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Thursday, 28 July 2016 18:16

Analysis Of The 2016 Box Office So Far

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Twenty years ago this month, Independence Day (or ID4 as it came to be known) was well on it's way to becoming the biggest movie of the summer. By the following January, it went on to become the highest grossing movie of the year and Hollywood's first billion dollar blockbuster. This month, the sequel, Independence Day: Resurgence is not drawing nearly the same number of audience members. Could it have anything to do with the fact that while an original idea at the time, it doesn't play so well with audiences today? You could argue that point although the very first Mission: Impossible movie opened a month and a half before ID4 in early summer '96 and last year, the fifth Mission movie still killed at the box office. One could argue that ID4 actually never even needed a sequel. Since the summer of '96 we've had War of the Worlds and several other aliens invading Earth movies (bet'cha forgot all about 2000's What Planet Are You From? That's okay. Most people do.) Plus, there is the terrible fact that 9/11 possibly changed attitudes about audiences not exactly jumping up and down in anticipation to see U.S. landmarks crumbled by laser blasts from the skies anymore. At least in those Avengers movies, they all threw themselves into buildings which then turn to bits of rubble, but then the govt. made the Avengers clean everything up afterwards. Try getting an alien creature to do that. Nope. Not happening.

Published in Film & Movie Tagged under Trailers Movies  Box-office  Margot Robbie

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Thursday, 28 July 2016 16:09

Lindsay Lohan's Fairy Tale Romance Is Over

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Lindsay Lohan is having as bad a week as recently ousted DNC chairperson Debbie Wasserman Shultz, what with her Russian fiance's (Lindsay's - not Debbie's) soap opera playing out in front of all of us, but you know who is having a week as great as Hillary Clinton? Lindsay's father Michael Lohan, who after a long, long silent spell, now gets to emerge as super-dad and act all concerned about his daughter's well-being. Somebody should remind him that he has two daughters but I don't think he even remembers the other one. ALI, Michael! Her name is Ali. I'm sure someday it'll come back to him.

Image Courtesy Instagram/Lindsay Lohan

Published in Celebrity Gossip Tagged under Lindsay Lohan

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Wednesday, 27 July 2016 18:00

Here's Jessica Alba's New Campaign For DL1961

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Here's Jessica Alba in a just released series of photos for DL1961 by Boo George. When I received these photos, I had to check the description twice as I thought it was a collection of images by Boy George. Now that would be odd. Turns out Boo George is a well-renowned fashion photographer who shoots for Vogue, Calvin Klein and others. This series is a campaign ad for the DL1969 line featuring designs from Riley Breath, Florence Seymore and Farrow Ringwald. I'm just as surprised as you to learn there's a designer named Riley Breath. Ain't that something?

These are some great images of Jessica and her great hair, great face, great style, great eyes, the great way she strolls casually down the street in tight leather pants. These are some classic, old school Alba photos. Not really understanding the reason for the photo of her leaning up against a window outside a dingy toilet stall. Is she in prison? That is some Orange Is The New Black mess going on there.

Speaking of unpleasant things - why isn't Jessica attending the big Hillary/Bernie battle royale currently going down in Philly? She spoke at the Democratic convention four years ago with Scarlett Johansson and Eva Longoria (who spoke Monday night), so why not this year? Oh, I know. Now that Scarlett is the highest grossing box office female of all time, she probably now believes she's too good to appear at something like that. Well. Thanks for nothing Mrs. rich girl. See if Jessica remembers you at Christmas and if she does, I hope she sends you a gift that will haunt you during all your days.   

 

Images Courtesy George Boo for DL1961

Published in Celebrity Gossip Tagged under Jessica Alba Fashion

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Wednesday, 27 July 2016 16:37

Lana Parrilla Absolutely Won Comic-Con This Year

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Unlike some people who had no business attending Comic-Con (see: Michele, Lea ) there were those with legitimate reasons for appearing at the fan convention and not only that, they actually transcended the event. One of these people is the talented and beautiful Lana Parrilla who plays Regina, The Evil Queen on ABC's Once Upon A Time. Lana was absolutely gorgeous as she attended her show's discussion panel along with her show's co-stars this past Saturday. Lana has been acting for nearly 20 years but I imagine she's never really experienced fan reaction such as she's receiving now. Honestly, I think seeing a woman as beautiful as Lana wandering around the halls at Comic-Con in a chic, sexy, red leather dress would get serious attention from the nerds. I hope they all had the good sense and manners to not grab and paw at her like filthy animals. I've a feeling Lana had enough of that from her years working on Spin City  with Charlie Sheen.

Image Courtesy Getty

Published in Celebrity Gossip Tagged under Lana Parrilla ComicCon Television

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Tuesday, 26 July 2016 18:34

Lea Michele Made Quite The Splash At Comic-Con

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Scream Queens star Lea Michele (though I actually believe she's like 5th billed in the show's opening credits) attended Comic-Con In San Diego this past weekend to take part in that series live panel discussion along with Emma Roberts, Abigail Breslin and Billy Lourd. I'm sure Lea was warmly received by convention nerds (not judging - I'm one too - and very lonely - forget I just typed that) who were very, very polite when they went up to her and asked "What Marvel blockbuster movie are you going to be in?" Of course, Lea isn't going to be in any Marvel blockbuster movies so I'm sure she instead took a large swallow (of her pride) and told attendees she's actually on a dumb Fox series that only gets 2.6 million viewers per week. Then she stuck out her chest from inside her low baring cleavage dress, flipped her hair and looked around for another celebrity she could run over and talk to instead of some convention nerds. Rude! If I was there, I would have asked her to say hello to a friend of mine on my phone - only to then remind her of this:

 



It's the gif that keeps on giving.

Image Courtesy Getty

Published in Celebrity Gossip Tagged under Lea Michele

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